10 second album review:

Horses by Patti Smith:

It doesn't suck, but it's also not the best album ever.

THINGS I LOVE:

The Donnas:





And from C-Bus:

HALLOWEEN...

To begin the countdown to the best Halloween ever, enjoy these...Mule Zep covers:






Both from the Bonnaroo late night show, 2007 that John and I hit up. Also, one of the best shows ever.

Er,

My evening schedules are now full:

..speechless...

It's been awhile...but, uh,

HOLY.
FUCKING.
SHIT.

I don't know whether to laugh at this or not...

To Tame a Land
by Iron Maiden (Harris)

He is the king of all the land
In the Kingdom of the sands
Of a time tomorrow.

He rules the sandworms and the Fremen
In a land amongst the stars
Of an age tomorrow.

He is destined to be a King
He rules over everything
On the land called planet Dune.

Bodywater is your life
And without it you would die
On the desert the planet Dune.

Without a stillsuit you would fry
On the sands so hot and dry
In a world called Arrakis.

It is a land that's rich in spice
The sandriders and the "mice"
That they call the "Muad'Dib".

He is the Kwizatz Haderach.
He is born of Caladan
And will take the Gom Jabbar.

He has the power to foresee
Or to look into the past
He is the ruler of the stars

The time will come for him
to lay claim his crown,
And then the foe yes
they'll be cut down,
You'll see he'll be the
best that there's been,
Messiah supreme
true leader of men,
And when the time
for judgement's at hand
Don't fret he's strong
and he'll make a stand,
Against evil and fire
That spreads through the land,
He has the power
to make it all end.

Nope, no laughing. It's awesome. FACT.

So,

Jason Statham? Still my hero; also totally awesome.

So for reals

I kind of want to get married now.

MS Word:

Why the hell does pressing shift 5 times turn on sticky keys? If somebody is typing and they're thinking before they type, it is useful to have a key that doesn't actually type anything to press. Now I can't even do that. Thanks for nothing you asshats. And your autoformatting SUCKS.

Tim and Eric

A "don't do drugs PSA" from Tim and Eric. Thanks guys.

Also, this is awesome, but takes way more time.

Every day I remember I cannot watch new episodes, I weep.

Note to self:

The sun comes up sometime before 5:30 over here.

Back to things that are important...

like the ABBA musical...which fails at many things...
But is still totally awesome at other things like this:



I mean I can totally understand Pierce Brosnan, but what happened to Colin Firth? Seriously, Mister Darcy? And he's gay? I...I...need some time alone. To think about things.

It was bound to happen....

Finally drank all the beer in the vending machine. TS for me...and everyone else I guess.

Another reason not to use anti-perspirent:

It makes my armpits itch like the dickens.

Procrastination

leads to hilarious finds on the "Best of Craigslist." At least it's more entertaining than writing or finding apartments.

Ferocious Attack Kitten

SERIOUS guitarist looking for like-minded bandmates to make it big.

rocketship/boat/race car/fort/house/time machine

Decapitated dolls

need a female companion 4 anything

Autographed Copy of Plato's Republic

To the Minotaur that lives above me.

Guitarist of megalomaniacal speed seeks audience who won't combust

Back to Paul Simon and work!

"SMOOTH JESUS MADE ME DO THIS!!!"

This is pretty funny:

Today....Is our INDEPENDANCE DAY!!!

So, I celebrated America being the best country ever by roaming around the hills of another country, beer always in hand, delicious steamed bun occasionally in hand. Imagine your local county fair (or, more accurately, the unlicensed Bonnaroo food vendors). Except, instead of everybody on drugs, everybody just speaks a totally different language. Of which I know "Hello," "thank you," "I am an American," and 1-100. And cat, dog and fish. Useful, right? Well, so far it's been enough to get by. The people here are so nice, I'm not too worried anyway. Although I've been warned 'no nightclubs' for several different reasons (thanks Yu-Ting, Boss). Anyway, here's a July 4th treat as I wander off to other places to celebrate. Imagine the most watered down light draft beer you can. Then water it down some more. You end up with:


Yes, that's right. Taiwanese Bar Beer. Made in Japan. FYI.

Nightmarkets are kind of awesome

Today I:
played softball outside the Genomics Research Center (or GRC Field as the locals call it). I know what I'm up to every afternoon if its not raining.
Went to a night market where I tried:
Watermelon juice
Pig blood cake
Stinky tofu
The sugariest drink EVER. And I once drank a heaping cup of sugar.

Also, I forgot my camera, so I couldn't take a picture of the the bags, hats, shirts, lighters and cigarette cases with pot/marijuana logos. Or stand after stand of ironic T-shirt. Fashion here blows my mind. Although on the bus they had a show about talking pinatas. So there's that.

I need to find a way to sneak-fish for those massive tilapia in the stream on campus.

It's been a while so,

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

!!!

Making Love Out of Nothing at All

Jim Steinman is brilliant:

I know just how to whisper
And I know just how to cry
I know just where I find the answers
And I know just how to lie
I know just how to fake it
And I know just how to scheme
I know just when to face the truth
And then I know just when to dream
And I know just where I touch you
And I know just what to prove
I know when to pull you closer
And I know when to let you loose

And I know the night is fading
And I know the time’s gonna fly
And I’m never gonna tell you everything I gotta tell you
But I know I’ve got to give it a try

And I know the roads to riches
And I know the ways to pain
I know all the rules and then I know how to break’em
And then I always know the name of the game

But I don’t know how to leave you
And I’ll never let you fall
And I don’t know how you do it
Making love out of nothing at all

Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all
Making love
Out of nothing at all

Everytime I see you, well the rays of the sun are all
Streaming through the waves in your hair
And every star in the sky is taking aim at your eyes
Like a spotlight
The beating of my heart is a drum and it’s lost
And it’s looking for a rhythm like you
You can take the darkness from the deep of the night
And turn it to a beacon burning endlessly bright
I gotta follow it ‘cause everything I know
Well, it’s nothing ‘till I give it to you

I can make the runner stumble
I can make the final block
And I can make every tackle at the sound of the whistle
And I can make all the stadiums rock

I can make tonight forever
Or I can make it disappear by the dawn
And I can make you every promise that’s ever been made
And I can make all your demons be gone

But I’m never gonna make it without you
Do you really wanna see me crawl ?
And I’m never gonna make it like you do
Making love out of nothing at all

Making love
Out of nothing at all...

Ugh....

FACT: Whiskey and popcorn do not a decent meal make.

NV R convention overrun by RP folks!

Even though this is old news, blastfaxkudos to NV Ron Paul supporters for stickin' it to those stuffy old white dudes in the NV GOP.I know Paul's got no chance, but it still makes me smile that there are folks out there willing to stick it to McCain. Like my dad said, "He's the best Democrat the Republicans can nominate."

Happy STD month!

I just found out that April is STD awareness month according to the CDC! They also say that 1 in 4 Americans has an STD, which I find...difficult to believe. Unless they're counting things that aren't necessarily sexually transmitted, like HPVs. In support of STD month, one clever nonprofit came up with the idea to email ecards to recent...partners...if you test positive for STDs. One is even in Spanish! My favorite and also the one I used after I got the clap after that gay dance party:

FACT: STDs are never not funny.

God I hate hippies

In case you didn't know (and you wouldn't if you're a creepy home-schooled shut-in) yesterday was 4/20, what some like to think of as the potsmoker's holiday. Why? I don't know. Hippies are stupid. So anyway, at 4:20 on 4/20 University of Colorado was lucky enough to play host to various 420-related shenanigans. Meaning a bunch of idiot kids got together to smoke pot at 4:20 for no reason other than it was 4/20. Show some shame, you dirty hippies!

I mean where's the day when I can drink all I want in public without the consequences? I still get in trouble for drinking followed by driving. I need to pick an arbitrary date/time for my new holiday, Beersday. The day you can drink all you want for as long as you want with no problems. From me. I mean, you can get or die or something.

My favorite quote comes from freshman Emily Benson: "People are getting out their best pot and hippie clothes today." Foolish girl, hippies don't have "best" clothes! In fact, I bet a bunch of them weren't even wearing clothes. I hate hippies so much.

Exactly:

LOVING CUP
(M. Jagger/K. Richards)

I'm the man on the mountain, come on up.
I'm the plowman in the valley with a face full of mud.
Yes, I'm fumbling and I know my car don't start.
Yes, I'm stumbling and I know I play a bad guitar.

Give me little drink from your loving cup.
Just one drink and I'll fall down drunk.

I'm the man who walks the hillside in the sweet summer sun.
I'm the man that brings you roses when you ain't got none.
Well I can run and jump and fish, but I won't fight
You if you want to push and pull with me all night.

Give me little drink from you loving cup.
Just one drink and I'll fall down drunk.

I feel so humble with you tonight,
Just sitting in front of the fire.
See your face dancing in the flame,
Feel your mouth kissing me again,
What a beautiful buzz, what a beautiful buzz,
What a beautiful buzz, what a beautiful buzz.
Oh, what a beautiful buzz, what a beautiful buzz.

Yes, I am nitty gritty and my shirt's all torn,
But I would love to spill the beans with you till dawn.

Give me little drink from your loving cup.
Just one drink and I'll fall down drunk.

Just to refocus the awesomeness:

My Name is Earl

really almost made me cry tonight. Seriously. And I don't do that. Ever. But when Randy said to Earl "I hope you crossed enough things off your list to get into heaven" that just about did it.

Washington DC

So I had orientation in DC from Sunday-Tuesday. Fun stuff, except I almost missed my flight to DC (I poorly misjudge time on a regular basis). Thankfully, I didn't need to check any luggage. An uneventful flight (although the plane was uncomfortably warm) and I arrived at Reagan Airport. It was really cool during the descent, as we flew by the Capitol building and right over the Washington, Jefferson and Lincoln monuments. I figured the picture wouldn't take too well from a plane window. Reagan Airport definitely looks like it was designed in the late 60s-early 70s, I mean look at those domes:
Anyway, in case you couldn't tell, that picture was taken from the Metro tracks. It turns out that the hotel wasn't really in walking distance, as the lady from the travel agency had led me to believe. So I got to figure out how to use the Metro in DC, which wasn't too bad. I took another picture prior to leaving the airport, but I'm not sure why. The DC Metro is definitely less creepy than Cleveland's RTA...although I have yet to see homeless people sleeping at RTA stations. Note how I said "yet".

So, I got a little lost coming out of the Metro station and ended up walking 4-5 blocks in the opposite direction. I eventually figured my way back and found the hotel, waited in a pretty long line to check in, threw my bags in the room and ran to wait in an even longer line to check in and register for orientation. Anyway, after the introductory talks and information, everyone was set free for dinner. I returned to my room to rest a bit but when I tried to check my email I found that internet connections cost $10 bucks for 24 hours. Needless to say, I was pissed. All the other hotels I've been to recently have had free internet, sometimes wireless. And I was even more pissed to find...well just look at the picture. WHO THE EFF USES THE HOTEL PHONE WHILE THEY'RE TAKING A DUMP??? I mean, I've already been freaked out by people (douches) talking on cell phones in airport bathrooms while taking a dump. But, really, no internet but a freaking phone next to the toilet? You Doubletree asshats. So great, no email for three days. The rest of the evening was uneventful, as I was tired. Ate dinner, came back, slept. But on the way to/back from dinner I did notice some things:

1. The hotel is very close to the Pentagon. As in, the Pentagon is across the highway. So I guess it shouldn't come as a shock that contractors like Boeing are in the same area. Although, I can't help but feel cynical knowing that Boeing is right across the street from the people handing out massive defense contracts. But I guess that's DC.
2. It was noticeably warmer there. And I know it's further south than Cleveland. But flowers? That's really rubbing it in. Jerks. I'll go back to my near-freezing weather.







3. I glanced at this, chuckled, thought about about it, went back to look again and laughed even harder.








Monday it was raining out, so nobody went out during the free time. Which made me kind of sad, as I wanted to see the Pentagon. At any rate, the breakout sessions for the individual countries were more helpful and I was easier to see other people who would be going to Taiwan. So after the all the talks, we took the Metro to the Mall area and walked around for a bit. It wasn't raining too bad, just sprinkles on and off. Still, I was ticked that I'd forgotten my camera. Anyway, we ended up at the Old Ebbitt Grill for dinner and drinkin'. The place was PACKED. We waited like 45 minutes, but eventually the beer flowed and the food was pretty good. When we got back to the hotel, we decided to go up to the top floor rotating bar. Good times, good times. I just wish that I'd taken more pictures.

I'm going to grow a beard like Christopher Cross

Also, this is pretty awesome:


And so is this (Metal version alert):

Most important emails in one day, ever!

1. Don't need to worry about going to Dallas. I'm kinda dissapointed, but at least I heard from him.

2. I DO need to worry about the interview in San Diego now. Which is awesome since starting this week (or as soon as I start having cells that are ready) I will:

3. Revise the paper for JCB. That's a lot of cyclohexamide assays to do. Wheeeee.

4. No messin' around tomorrow. Paul Simon all day, plannin' and workin'!

5. And don't forget ASBMB and Taiwan. Forgot the Taipei guidebook though.

6. Nothing from NYU? Oh well.

7. Should get the cat soon. That's exciting too.

What a crazy day! Time to relax and listen to some Paul Simon and read some Bakker.

This explains a lot:

Also, it rocks.

Wasted
by The Donnas

I can't sleep can't even breathe
you're a devious distraction
when you put your hands on me
you start a chemical reaction

oh oh oh oh
oh oh oh oh

can't think straight can't count to two
all the risk that we've been taking
i don't know what it is about you
but you always leave me shaking
Cuz' i'm a train wreck in the makin'
it's all strung out but it's not so bad
you're the fix i've never had

the first time i saw your face
i've got wasted on your love
i'm a total wreck i'm a basketcase
i'm a user you're my drug

i can't seem to stop myself
when it comes to indiscretion
i left my conscience somewhere else
another public makeout session
it's a late night confession
can't wake up and i can't calm down
i want it bad i want it now

the first time i saw your face
i've got wasted on your love
i'm a total wreck i'm a basketcase
i'm a user you're my drug
[Wasted lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]


i'm wasted on your love

i'm already gone
la la lalala la la lalala
i'm barely hanging on
la la lalala la la lalala
i'm passed out on your lawn
la la lalala la la lalala
all the damage that you've done
you're turning me into a fiend

the first time i saw your face
oh oh oh oh
the first time i saw your face
oh oh oh oh

[solo]

the first time i saw your face
i've got wasted on your love
i'm a total wreck i'm a basketcase
i'm a user you're my drug

the first time i saw your face
i'm wasted on your love [Wasted on your love]
the first time i saw your face
i'm wasted on your love [Wasted on your love]

i'm a total wreck i'm a basketcase
i'm wasted [Wasted]wasted on your love

the first time i saw your face
i'm wasted [wasted] wasted on your[wasted]
wasted on your love

FACT:

[late] saturday lyrics:

I believe in a thing called love
by The Darkness

Can't explain all the feelings that you're making me feel
My heart's in overdrive and you're behind the steering wheel

Touching you, touching me
touching you, god you're touching me

I believe in a thing called love
Just listen to the rhythm of my heart
There's a chance we could make it now
We'll be rocking 'til the sun goes down
I believe in a thing called love
Ooh!

I wanna kiss you every minute, every hour, every day
You got me in a spin but everythin' is A.OK!

Touching you, touching me
touching you, god you're touching me

I believe in a thing called love
Just listen to the rhythm of my heart
There's a chance we could make it now
We'll be rocking 'til the sun goes down
I believe in a thing called love
Ooh! Guitar!

Touching you, touching me
touching you, god you're touching me

I believe in a thing called love
Just listen to the rhythm of my heart
There's a chance we could make it now
We'll be rocking 'til the sun goes down
I believe in a thing called love
Ooh!

Sunday evening (not sad) lyrics

This is the only Cracker video I've seen on VH1 classic. Also, it's an awesome song.

Teen Angst (What the World needs now)
by Cracker

I don't know what the world may need,
but I'm sure as hell that is starts with me.
And that's a wisdom,
I've laughed at.

I don't know what the world may want,
but a good stiff drink it surely don't.
So I think I'll go and fix myself a tall one.

Cause, what the world needs now
is a new kind of tension.
Cause the old one just bores me to death.
Cause, what the world needs now
is another folk singer
like I need a hole in my head.

I don't know what the world may need,
but a V8 engine is a good start for me.
Think I'll drive to find a place,
to be surly.
I don't know what the world may want,
but some words of wisdom could comfort us.
Think I'll leave that up to someone wiser.

Cause, what the world needs now
are some true words of wisdom
like La La La La La
Cause, what the world needs now
is another folk singer
like I need a hole in my head.

I don't know what the world may need,
and I never grasped your complexities.
I'd be happy just to get your attention.
And, I don't know what the world may want,
but your long, sweet body lying next
to mine could certainly raise my spirits.

Cause what the world needs now
is a new Frank Sinatra
so I can get you in bed.
Cause what the world needs now
is another folk singer
like I need a hole in my head.

The real contest tonight in GB:

It's this:


























vs. this:

Christopher Cross:

He also rocks your face off

So...

Now that everything is apparently is coming up Milhouse, when do I get fucking kicked in the nuts?

Sad Saturday morning lyrics

Helpless
Neil Young

There is a town in north Ontario,
With dream comfort memory to spare,
And in my mind
I still need a place to go,
All my changes were there.

Blue, blue windows behind the stars,
Yellow moon on the rise,
Big birds flying across the sky,
Throwing shadows on our eyes.
Leave us

Helpless, helpless, helpless
Baby can you hear me now?
The chains are locked
and tied across the door,
Baby, sing with me somehow.

Blue, blue windows behind the stars,
Yellow moon on the rise,
Big birds flying across the sky,
Throwing shadows on our eyes.
Leave us

Helpless, helpless, helpless.

FACT:

Michael McDonald rules your face.

Uh,

Why don't I own this comic book???

Iron Man vs. Doctor Doom: Doomquest HC: Okay, admittedly, twenty bucks might seem like a lot to pay for a comic that contains a grand total of four (4) issues, but when said issues are:

a) about Iron Man and Dr. Doom traveling back to the days of King Arthur and beating the crap out of each other,

b) full of Dr. Doom referring to Iron Man as “errand boy!” and “lackey!” in virtually every scene where they interact, and

c) totally awesome

From the ISB